Wednesday, June 26, 2013
Wednesday, March 6, 2013
dearest deer
Dearest Deer,
Don't get us wrong, we love you. We just feel that an attitude adjustment is needed...on YOUR part.
You see, we think you guys are kinda being jerks. You would think that after months of lovingly watching you (that's right, LOVINGLY WATCHING, not stalking), getting to know you and your habits, and providing food for you, you would let us get close enough to cuddle you, or - at the very least - let us leave the house to go to campus without making us feel like we're monsters for waking you up from your morning naps. We can't even move around in our own apartment without worrying about disturbing you, because you can see us through the windows and that "startles" you. Ridiculous.
I mean, have we done ANYTHING to make you believe we're going to harm you? We feed you at least twice a day during the week, and EVERY TIME you deign to grace us with your presence on the weekends. We include food for YOU on our shopping list, and make special trips to the store for YOU. Yet, you continue to act like we're trying to catch you and eat you. And it's getting WORSE. For a while there, it really felt like we were making progress, but now it seems like this whole relationship is moving backwards.
Don't play stupid with us. WE KNOW that YOU KNOW that we are the ones providing you with all those yummy treats. Sure, you play stupid now, but we all know that there was a time when we could just shake a bag of goodies, and all of you would just come trotting over the creek on that fallen tree to get your fill.
Now, you think its okay to make us wait around like a couple of schmucks with a giant sack of yummies in the freezing cold, while you hang out in a group and laugh at us? Not cool. You're making us feel like that deer you were bullying back in October:
At the time, we felt bad for that poor deer, but we never thought that you would ostracize us that way. Now we know better. You don't even care, do you?
Is this about the zucchini? Did you not like it? We noticed that you seem willing to eat pine needles and roots, but you are actively rejecting the bell peppers. What's up with that?
Also, what's up with this whole, "we will only eat off of the first two stairs to the apartment, but ignore anything from the third stair on" thing? We know you can reach the food on the third step - you're just leaving it there to insult us, aren't you?
So what if Lane is trying to get you to come closer to our door? So what if we're doing this in an effort to lure you into our home? Are you telling us that you prefer to stay out in the cold? That you WANT to sleep in the snow? That you WANT to eat bark? That you would rather stay outside in the freezing weather with the coyotes and coy-dogs than let us spend a little quality time with you in our AWESOME apartment? We would fill our bathtub with food for you, if you wanted us to, do you hear us? OUR BATHTUB.
We're not asking for much, maybe just a little more give in addition to your take. Is that too much to ask, given our history? Remember the good times? Remember that time you came right up to our porch? Remember how we were all friends? Maybe this will jog your memory:
Just think about it. Please?
Your friends forever (or at least until we move in May),
The Puppy and the Penguin
P.S. We know you can be sweet - we saw you cleaning snow off baby.
P.P.S. And do you really want to stay out in this?!
Don't get us wrong, we love you. We just feel that an attitude adjustment is needed...on YOUR part.
You see, we think you guys are kinda being jerks. You would think that after months of lovingly watching you (that's right, LOVINGLY WATCHING, not stalking), getting to know you and your habits, and providing food for you, you would let us get close enough to cuddle you, or - at the very least - let us leave the house to go to campus without making us feel like we're monsters for waking you up from your morning naps. We can't even move around in our own apartment without worrying about disturbing you, because you can see us through the windows and that "startles" you. Ridiculous.
I mean, have we done ANYTHING to make you believe we're going to harm you? We feed you at least twice a day during the week, and EVERY TIME you deign to grace us with your presence on the weekends. We include food for YOU on our shopping list, and make special trips to the store for YOU. Yet, you continue to act like we're trying to catch you and eat you. And it's getting WORSE. For a while there, it really felt like we were making progress, but now it seems like this whole relationship is moving backwards.
Don't play stupid with us. WE KNOW that YOU KNOW that we are the ones providing you with all those yummy treats. Sure, you play stupid now, but we all know that there was a time when we could just shake a bag of goodies, and all of you would just come trotting over the creek on that fallen tree to get your fill.
Now, you think its okay to make us wait around like a couple of schmucks with a giant sack of yummies in the freezing cold, while you hang out in a group and laugh at us? Not cool. You're making us feel like that deer you were bullying back in October:
At the time, we felt bad for that poor deer, but we never thought that you would ostracize us that way. Now we know better. You don't even care, do you?
Is this about the zucchini? Did you not like it? We noticed that you seem willing to eat pine needles and roots, but you are actively rejecting the bell peppers. What's up with that?
Also, what's up with this whole, "we will only eat off of the first two stairs to the apartment, but ignore anything from the third stair on" thing? We know you can reach the food on the third step - you're just leaving it there to insult us, aren't you?
So what if Lane is trying to get you to come closer to our door? So what if we're doing this in an effort to lure you into our home? Are you telling us that you prefer to stay out in the cold? That you WANT to sleep in the snow? That you WANT to eat bark? That you would rather stay outside in the freezing weather with the coyotes and coy-dogs than let us spend a little quality time with you in our AWESOME apartment? We would fill our bathtub with food for you, if you wanted us to, do you hear us? OUR BATHTUB.
We're not asking for much, maybe just a little more give in addition to your take. Is that too much to ask, given our history? Remember the good times? Remember that time you came right up to our porch? Remember how we were all friends? Maybe this will jog your memory:
Just think about it. Please?
Your friends forever (or at least until we move in May),
The Puppy and the Penguin
P.S. We know you can be sweet - we saw you cleaning snow off baby.
P.P.S. And do you really want to stay out in this?!
Saturday, February 9, 2013
Saturday, February 2, 2013
New Year New Post
First thing's first. We FAILED at becoming vegan. It was pretty sad. After moving out to Ithaca, Lane and I valiantly attempted to cut all animal products out of our diet. We were able to go for roughly two days before cracking. We decided, since we were being "SO GOOD", that we deserved to treat ourselves to chicken wings.This, in itself, should show how desperate we were for meat, since I generally don't even like chicken wings. This went on for about two weeks, where we would stick to our vegan diet for about two days, then splurge on some sort of unhealthy meat product. It was bad. So we gave up. The end.
In other, long overdue, news, we moved out of the apartment we were living in at the beginning of the school year? When we got back here for the fall, the apartment we moved into was ATROCIOUS. We got in on a red-eye flight, and didn't even have the keys to the apartment (the property management company was supposed to put this in the mailbox for us... they didn't). Thankfully, I was eventually able to track down an emergency maintenance number for the place, and we had to wait for about half-an-hour to be let in.
The place was FILTHY. It definitely had not been cleaned, and for some reason, I could not stop sneezing. Turns out, that even though this property management company is known for cashing in security deposits for exiting tenants, they don't actually use it to clean. Fraud anyone? Not only that, there was mold EVERYWHERE. Seriously. EVERYWHERE. If you feel squeamish about mold, don't look at the following few pictures.
In addition to these areas, there was mold throughout the apartment, and water damage everywhere. So I was having severe allergies, and we told the management company that they needed to get rid of the mold, or release us from our lease. They told us that painting over the mold would get rid of it, but, obviously, since we're not idiots, we didn't believe them (apparently, for the management company, paint can fix anything, including crumbling walls).
We let them do their version of "fixing" things, then brought in a mold inspector. He examined the apartment and took some air samples to check on the mold situation. He sent these off to the lab, and when we got the results back, the report told us we had TOXIC BLACK MOLD. Not only that, when we talked to the inspector, he told us these were the highest numbers he had ever seen, and that it could be fatal (this, after the management company told me it was my fault that I was allergic to their lovingly raised mold). Oh, also, he let us know that the area under the bathtub was all dry-rot, so basically we could have taken a shower and fallen into the apartment below.
Needless to say, we decided to move out (thankfully, this had all taken place within the span of three weeks or so, and a professor in my program was kind enough to invite us to stay at his gorgeous house), and sued to get our deposit back. We ended up settling in our favor, but seriously, this property management company is exactly what is wrong with the world. Anyone moving into Ithaca, if you want to know who this is, leave a comment, and I'll let you know.
Thankfully, we stumbled upon the most gorgeous new loft, just outside of town. We saw pictures of it on Craigslist, and fell in LOVE with it. Turns out, the owner wasn't able to finish it before the fall housing rush, so it was still available when we got to it. Want to see pictures? I know you do.
All this, completely furnished, and includes our own washer/dryer (hallelujah), radiant heating (no dust blowing around), internet/utilities, and adorable animal neighbors. Seriously. Our landlord (who is a jazz pianist) and his girlfriend (who runs a wildlife rescue) have the cutest pets, and when they're out of town, we get to go over and play with the little creatures. One cute bunny with blue eyes, and two lovey kitties. They also used to have a white chinchilla, but, sadly, he passed away recently. He was the funniest thing - it was like he was constantly trying to take over the world. The only picture I have of any of the animals is Bubba the bunny, so feast your eyes:
Bubba is very easily persuaded by food. You only need to shake his little jar of treats, and sing his "Treat" song, and he will instantly go to his cage. Pathetic, but adorable.
I think that's it for now... Oh wait, Chinese New Year is coming up! That's why the apartment is now actually clean enough that I can post pictures of it... it is also partially the reason for making this:
Win. I had never made it before, and it was surprisingly close to what one typically gets at a Chinese restaurant. We were pretty happy. Happy New Year!
In other, long overdue, news, we moved out of the apartment we were living in at the beginning of the school year? When we got back here for the fall, the apartment we moved into was ATROCIOUS. We got in on a red-eye flight, and didn't even have the keys to the apartment (the property management company was supposed to put this in the mailbox for us... they didn't). Thankfully, I was eventually able to track down an emergency maintenance number for the place, and we had to wait for about half-an-hour to be let in.
The place was FILTHY. It definitely had not been cleaned, and for some reason, I could not stop sneezing. Turns out, that even though this property management company is known for cashing in security deposits for exiting tenants, they don't actually use it to clean. Fraud anyone? Not only that, there was mold EVERYWHERE. Seriously. EVERYWHERE. If you feel squeamish about mold, don't look at the following few pictures.
 |
| actual fruiting bodies of the mold. this was how mature it was, people. |
 |
| mold on the blinds (the management said were were responsible for them) |
 |
| dead bugs in closed cupboards? I doubt they cleaned. |
We let them do their version of "fixing" things, then brought in a mold inspector. He examined the apartment and took some air samples to check on the mold situation. He sent these off to the lab, and when we got the results back, the report told us we had TOXIC BLACK MOLD. Not only that, when we talked to the inspector, he told us these were the highest numbers he had ever seen, and that it could be fatal (this, after the management company told me it was my fault that I was allergic to their lovingly raised mold). Oh, also, he let us know that the area under the bathtub was all dry-rot, so basically we could have taken a shower and fallen into the apartment below.
Needless to say, we decided to move out (thankfully, this had all taken place within the span of three weeks or so, and a professor in my program was kind enough to invite us to stay at his gorgeous house), and sued to get our deposit back. We ended up settling in our favor, but seriously, this property management company is exactly what is wrong with the world. Anyone moving into Ithaca, if you want to know who this is, leave a comment, and I'll let you know.
Thankfully, we stumbled upon the most gorgeous new loft, just outside of town. We saw pictures of it on Craigslist, and fell in LOVE with it. Turns out, the owner wasn't able to finish it before the fall housing rush, so it was still available when we got to it. Want to see pictures? I know you do.
 |
| the view from upstairs towards the kitchen |
 |
| where we sleep. |
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| where lane studies... sometimes. |
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| our spiral staircase. My toes in the upper right. |
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| our living room. amazing view & internet tv included. |
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| our living room, front door to the left. |
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| view from our windows. the deer love it here. |
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| bubba lapinopolis (greek, bc of the blue eyes) |
I think that's it for now... Oh wait, Chinese New Year is coming up! That's why the apartment is now actually clean enough that I can post pictures of it... it is also partially the reason for making this:
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| Char Siu aka Chinese BBQ Pork |
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